Director: Michael Hurst
Runtime: 95 minutes
Country: USA
Color: Color
Audio: 5.1 and 2.0 surround
Studio: Lions Gate
Certification: R

Buy it now on amazon.com!

Myself and corporatedemon have both passed on (the very idea of) House of the Dead 2 a minimum of 15 times. We passed on the sequel for fear of an overdose of nonsense, monotony, homemade bullet-time, and of course, video-game footage. Instead, HotD2 delivers a multitude of cleverly misleading character introductions/zombie scenarios, loads of uncompromising gore, and even a zombie football team (complete with flesh-hungry cheerleaders)!

The story revolves around a college campus that has been overrun by the newer and highly popular breakneck speed zombies (which in the film are referred to as hyper-sapiens). Influenced heavily by James Cameron’s Aliens Read the rest of this entry »

Director: Marius Penczner
Runtime: 105 min
Country: USA
Language: English
Color: Black and White
Sound Mix: Mono
Certification: UK: 12

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If I’ve learned anything from movies, it’s this: aliens are dicks! In first contact situations we should shoot aliens in the face double-time quick-like! Sure, you’re bound to frag an E.T. or two, but can we risk meeting up with something like a face hugger? I’m willing to off Kazoo, Alf, and Mork, to insure that my chest remains intact. Xenophobic? Probably, but Hollywood has assured me that you are far more likely to encounter a bunch of conniving, monument blowing-up, people hunting, jerks. Alien pricks… is there any better plot fodder to use in a b-movie? I think not. Neither does Marius Penczner. Without any further adieu, let’s get to the nitty-gritty guts of “I Was a Zombie for the F.B.I.” Read the rest of this entry »

Director:Michael Su
Runtime:76 mins
Screen Format: 4 X 3
MPAA Rating: N/A
Parental Warning: Strong Language, Graphic Violence/Gore
Country: USA

Sadly, you can actually buy this at Amazon.com

Nearly every time I sit down to write a new breview I get rather self–conscious and honestly a little nervous. I worry about my grammar, spelling, intro, body and conclusion. I worry about what I should focus on, what I should leave out, and what I want the end reader to “take home” with them after investing the time to read my literary effort…

But not this time. This time I’m not worried about a single thing. I am confident in knowing that I can casually spew out ANYTHING and it will have a superior thought process than Doomed.

Here’s the script: Drop 10 criminals on an island. Divide them into 5 teams. Read the rest of this entry »