Directed by: Ti West
Runtime: Argentina:80 min (Mar del Plata Film Festival) / USA:80 min
Country: USA
Language: English
Color: Color
Certification: UK:18 / Argentina:18

Buy ANYTHING Instead!

“An unheralded horror gem…Displays a raw talent reminscent of early George Romero and Sam Raimi.” -Fangoria

“One of the best, if not THE best horror flicks of the year.” -Bloody-Disgusting.com

“A creepy, old-fashioned 80’s sleep-over movie, with the perfect blend of blood, screams and scares.” -Eli Roth, Director of Cabin Fever

“B is for BORRRR-IIIIINNNGG.” -bisforbrains.com

Now that I have my initial childish remark out of the way, let’s get serious. Continue »

Directed by: Gabriel Bartalos
Runtime: 97 min
Country: USA
Language: English
Color: Color (DeLuxe)
Certification: USA:R / Germany:18 / UK:18

Buy it now on amazon.com!

This gem of a B-dazzling B-movie is initially a re-hash of classics much like Texas Chainsaw Massacre. A group of travelers is welcomed into a freaky slasher country-house by a seemingly benign granny lady. Once they’re sufficiently deep within the crazy-pit all hell breaks loose and the weirdies come out of the woodwork slashing, biting, and.. plate-throwing?

Yes, you heard right. There is a character in this movie named Plates. He is so aptly named because of a unique ability to buff and launch his porcelain discs at high velocities. Plates is played by the science-fiction and horror veteran Warwick Davis, the only actual actor in the film that has been in Continue »

Directed by: Jeff Thomas
MPAA: Rated R for horror violence/gore, language and some drug content.
Runtime: USA:93 min
Country: USA
Language: English
Color: Color
Sound Mix: Stereo
Certification: USA:Unrated / USA:R

Buy it now on amazon.com!

I must say, I’m impressed. Definitely not blown away…but impressed.

13 Seconds (not to be confused with 8 Seconds starring Luke “Mega-Sideburn” Perry) is a surprisingly decent flick from up and coming director Jeff Thomas. The plot revolves around a rock band called “Night Gallery” that is expecting to record their next album at some old abandoned private school. For some reason, the school seems to be in perfect condition despite the fact that it’s been abandoned since around 1932. Also, the musicians look about as “rock ‘n roll” as the local late-twenties rockers down the street that can’t get any gigs because they’re too busy playing the latest Madden on X-Box 360 Continue »

Directed by: Donovan Kelly
Format: Closed-captioned, Color, NTSC
Language: English
Unrated Version.
Runtime: 86 min
Studio: New Concorde

Buy it…for some odd reason.

When you run a movie review site such as this one, you’re bound put yourself through a relentless amount of torture every now and then. But that’s the risk we at b4brainz are willing to take.

Wolfhound has something to do with an American writer that has just arrived in Ireland. He’s staying at his late parents humble ol’ abode in order to garner some inspiration for his next novel. Problem is, he’s brought his wife and kids along with him…bad idea buddy, haven’t you ever seen The Shining? His wife is a sporadic bipolar nut-case, which sounds exciting written down but it’s really not. The kids are…kids. There are a number of mangy dogs lingering around the supposed-to-be- Continue »

Directed by: Kevin Kangas
MPAA: Rated R for violence, some nudity and brief language.
Runtime: 106 min
Country: USA
Language: English
Color: Color
Certification: USA:R

Buy it now on amazon.com!

I used to hate clowns beyond reason. I was so terrified of their unnaturally white faces and constant grins there was no possible way my parents could ever take me to the circus (which is fine by me at this point, I refuse to support circuses and zoos. Animals aren’t here for human entertainment people!). It wasn’t until I forced myself to watch Killer Klowns From Outer Space as an early teen that I was able to break myself of this fear. Yeah. Laugh at me all you want, just stating the facts.

So when I picked up Fear of Clowns, I was expecting a similar goofy, tongue in cheek flick with plenty of crazy clown antics. Instead, what I got was a Continue »

Directed by: Matt Busch
Country: USA
Language: English
Color: Color

Waste your money on it here!

I feel like my patience has just gone through the most painfully rigorous test imaginable.

For those not in-the-know, Conjure is a horror flick from the “Rock Star of Illustration,” Matt Busch. Even if you’ve never heard Busch’s name, you have more than likely seen his work on everything from Star Wars to The Crow to The Lord of The Rings. Being an artist myself, I truly admire his incredible talent and style. This movie on the other hand is an entirely different story.

The plot is a thrown-together (literally, watch the extras) cluster-fuck of mammoth proportions. Matt runs across an old photograph of a castle while wandering through a graveyard. It was “calling his name,” so he took it and decided to paint it. After beginning the painting, he and his foxy-wife-with-an-attitude, Sarah, begin to have strange Continue »