Buy it and burn it.

Good lord…

So Maverick Entertainment has sent me a couple flops already. First there was Cult, then Doomed and The Toybox. I fully understand that everyone makes mistakes, even distributing companies, so I decided to keep giving them a chance. But that chance is over and I’m vowing to never watch another movie from Maverick. I don’t mean to be a hater, but there’s only so much a man can take. And this man has reached his limit with Bad Reputation and Death Knows Your Name. Oh, where to begin…

Bad Reputation is about a nice young gal named Michelle who unfortunately gets some severely harsh treatment from the cool kids at school. They rape her, beat her up, and break her down. Then she gets pissed off and starts killing all the football playing douche bags and their girlfriends one by one. It’s original, really.

My favorite part of the entire movie is when the credits start rolling at the most random, least conclusive part of the whole story.

Some how, some way, Bad Reputation has taken the cake at quite a few horror themed film festivals around the world. I’m just glad I wasn’t at any of them, because if this was the BEST I would have wanted to blow my pink and purple brains out.

AVOID.

ZIP.
ZERO.
ZILCH.

Buy it now through (5)aint Productions!

Dementia is, quite simply, about a man who is coming unglued. The circumstances with which he loses himself are made apparent through the course of the movie but obviously involve his wife and daughter, who are featured in the teaser. We see early on that Danny, who is afflicted with the titular state of mind, has a hideous scar over his heart. A poignant link to the past, it’s most likely a constant reminder of the tragedy that occurred to (or within) his family.

Dementia has the ingredients necessary to capture any independent film audience: a lead character who has sympathetic convictions, a background filled with mystery, and a raw, unhindered belief that propels his actions. He’s not a mindless, angry slasher. Our lead is torn between his past life’s sociopolitical standards, and his newly formed rationale. A vigilante at heart, his initial intentions soon become warped and twisted. Bent on rescuing the failing society that surrounds him by dealing out punishment where he sees fit, his delusions quickly shift gears and he begins taking out his own personal frustrations on various innocent passersby in the most maniacal of manners. The film is truly unpredictable, and therefore it manages to be enticing.

To dismantle the physical appearance of the flick, it truly is budget-less. The quality is always consistent, but the cinematography is uninspired and the audio barely meets even average B standards. The editing is full of quick cuts, lingering moments, strange dissolves that continually left me scratching my head (but not in a “woah.. that was sweet, but what was it?”-kind of way. More like a “uhh…that… um… uhh….”-kind of way). Dementia contains the sets, acting, and blocking that are equivalent to your average porno. However, you really can’t laugh at any of the performances (which we love doing here at bisforbrains), and maybe that’s a compliment to the writing and direction. I can guarantee, though, that if these actors were spouting out mindless verbalizations about being vaporized by aliens or puppet creatures that drill holes into their brains, we would have been cracking up continually.

I must commend the director, Jon Price, who managed to stay acceptably far away from ‘cool’, ‘music video’ film making. Aside from a few quick uses of blurry digital effects filters to enhance Danny’s vacations from reality, there are almost no instances where the film tries to be overly flashy and/or hip, which, in this day and age, is extremely easy to abuse.

I thought the movie was very entertaining, and I fully appreciate what Jon Price has done with a complete lack of budget in creating a mysterious and intriguing character through decent dialogue and competent direction. There are even a few comedic touches to keep you laughing, such as the line “I don’t know if you knew this, but… people thinkin’ you’re psycho’s not the best thing when you’re tryin’ to get a new job.”

I can’t wait to see what this guy can do with a little dough, as well as a reputable cinematographer and editor. Price is certainly in-tune with what’s necessary to keep an audience glued to the screen.

THE 4th WALL: Crashes down, Kool-Aid Man style.
LENGTH: Any more, and the fun would have ceased.
GORE: Short, but oh so unnervingly sweet.

Buy it now on amazon.com!

I used to hate clowns beyond reason. I was so terrified of their unnaturally white faces and constant grins there was no possible way my parents could ever take me to the circus (which is fine by me at this point, I refuse to support circuses and zoos. Animals aren’t here for human entertainment people!). It wasn’t until I forced myself to watch Killer Klowns From Outer Space as an early teen that I was able to break myself of this fear. Yeah. Laugh at me all you want, just stating the facts.

So when I picked up Fear of Clowns, I was expecting a similar goofy, tongue in cheek flick with plenty of crazy clown antics. Instead, what I got was a serious, original thriller about one artist’s extreme coulrophobia.

Lynn is an intelligent, self-sustained artist that does highly acclaimed clown paintings for a living. She’s currently going through a brutal divorce with a total pencil-thin mustache douche-bag. When she begins housesitting for a friend, people in the neighborhood begin dying left and right. To make things worse, she keeps seeing a creepy clown around town (yeah, I did that on purpose), causing the police to think she is pulling some kind of publicity stunt. It isn’t until she meets a suave-overly-rich-hunk, sells her most expensive painting and is offered a 20 grand commission piece that things seem to look up for her…until the killings turn from random neighbors to her closest friends.

The story is really what makes Fear of Clowns shine. Granted, it’s not perfect, but it creates a suitably dark atmosphere that had me genuinely intrigued and trying to figure out what would happen next. At first, I was afraid that it was going to turn into just another tale of split-personalities, with Lynn herself being the true killer. Thankfully, I was dead wrong. The story is far beyond this now cliche plot-twist. To lighten the mood, the homicide detective played by Frank Lama makes for a fantastic comic relief. His gum-smacking wise-guy persona steals the screen every time, I hope to see more of him in the future. The lead performance by Jacky Reres is damn impressive, there were only a few minor moments with her that caused my eyes to role.

One person I really have to give props to on the crew of Fear of Clowns is Chad Seiter. His original score is absolutely haunting. Just listening to the opening credits sends chills up my spine. Unfortunately, it seems as if the editors knew how good the music was and therefore turned the music up a little too loud in certain areas, causing it to distract from some of the dialog.

If you’re looking for gore, Fear of Clowns is not the choice for you. In fact, whenever someone dies you hardly ever see the actual death. The fear comes solely from the muscle-bound titan of a villain, Shivers the Clown. They couldn’t have found a better person than Mark Lassise to play Shivers. He truly is a sight to behold, especially with those glossy shark-like eyes. Not to mention he wields his battle-axe (that’s right, BATTLE-AXE) with a barbarian’s charisma.

In the end, the only thing that truly bugs me about Fear of Clowns is that it’s just too damn long. If some of the extra fat were to be shaved off, I would have given this the highest possible rating. Don’t let this deter you from watching it though. As long as you don’t watch it in hopes of a gore-filled-circus-freak-laugh-fest you won’t be disappointed!

“That’s the biggest fucking clown I’ve ever seen!” – Detective Peters.

STORYLINE: Much deeper than you would expect.
DETECTIVE PETERS: I love this guy!
SHIVERS THE CLOWN: A Grease-Paint Goliath!

Buy it now at amazon.com!

“Anal itch got you down?”

I’ve always heard about this little flick from Scott Spiegel & Lawrence Bender, but have never been able to find it anywhere…one of the many problems of living in the very definition of “Rural Location.” So when I saw the director’s cut was available at the local video store, I snatched it like a klepto on speed. To make things even better, I wasn’t even the slightest bit let down. In fact my expectations were exceeded on nearly every level!

The scenario for the film goes a little like this: A group of teens work at the local Walnut Lake Market that is run by two good ol’ boys. It’s nearly closing time, and an unwanted customer shows up. It turns out he is the ex-boyfriend of the 80’s-licious blonde cashier with monster-bangs. He proceeds to be a total douche bag and the entire crew takes their chance to beat him up and throw him out of the store. After closing time, he is still lingering around…and the shit begins to hit the fan.

Intruder is shot with an artist’s eye, making it stand out among other low-budget horror flicks of its kind. Nearly every segment has at least one memorable camera angle, usually they give the feeling that the characters are always being watched, which really adds to the suspense.

Despite having lots of top-notch gore and cinematography, the movie is packed with one-liners and visual gags that had me giggling like the geek I am. SPOILER WARNING: One prime example is when we see the butcher Ted Raimi receive a knife to the back of his head, and as he falls out of frame a sign is revealed that reads “Safety First – Knives are Sharp – Please Be Careful.” END SPOILER.

The death scenes in this movie are second to none with absolutely fantastic gore. If you’ve never been afraid of operating heavy machinery or working around sharp objects, this movie will make you feel differently. Nearly everything you could imagine somebody hurting themselves with in a grocery store gets used for carnage – and boy are these tools used well! SPOILER WARNING: We get to see with much clarity a headache-inducing-hammer-to-the-head, a nail to the eye, a head split by a trash compactor, a guy hung by his neck on a meat-hook, a bludgeoning with a severed head (!!!) and a face divided in half by a meat slicer END SPOILER. I was cringing in certain parts and I watch this kind of shit all the time!

The acting is actually pretty good throughout the entire movie. Every now and then the characters are a little over the top, but that makes it even more entertaining. The only scene that has laughably bad acting is when one of the teens asks the lead-woman out for a date…it is totally apparent they really don’t give a shit about eachother…and I love it.

It’s a little annoying how the box lists Bruce Campbell on the front, and shows a picture of him on the back, when he actually only makes a cameo for a minute or so. Speaking of cameos, one of the very first shots features a close-up of the best cereal of all time, CrazyCow!

There are also a couple little parts that are completely ridiculous as far as the gore is concerned. SPOILER WARNING: When one character gets stabbed in the stomach, blood SPRAYS out like water out of a hose when pressured by a thumb! Also, towards the end when the villain gets stabbed in the gut, he falls backwards, and by some miracle of God the knife flies UPWARDS out of his body, SPINS through the air and sticks nicely into a crate nearby. END SPOILER. Now these two little things are funny and cheesy, but considering the rest of the gore is so gruesomely realistic, they kind of stick out like sore thumbs. I could easily see how it might lighten the mood for some viewers, it just didn’t work for me.

In the end, this is a slasheriffic flick that will satisfy any gore fan. It also has a pretty well played-out plot twist that will satisfy the suspense fans out there. Well worth the money and time…just don’t watch it for Bruce Campbell!

HUMOR: Excellent spoken & visual gags.
VIOLENCE: INCREDIBLE!!!
NUDITY: Non-existent.